Being Jealous of the Timer

Have you ever seen a really long speech and all you think is, "Wow. This is a really long speech," and the longness of it all is just overwhelming? Well, I have. Trust me, those speeches are long. Well, in actuality, they don't have to be particularly lengthy for me to be annoyed. Just slow and/or boring. This used to happen to me often when I watched debate rounds that I could not follow. I would glance at the timer and wish I could know what the little screen read. Somehow the knowledge that this speech may be almost over might give me comfort of some sort. But I never have that knowledge. It is at moments like this that I wish I was the timer.

This is an absurd thing for us SCHSADK's to wish, because as you know, timing is no picnic. Not just anyone can do it. More often the timer should wish to not be the timer. That would make more sense. But when I'm watching a long and/or confusing speech or debate round, I'm not really in the mood to make sense. So I try to communicate telepathically with the timer:

Me: (Dude, please look at me.)
Timer: -doesn't look at me-
Me: (C'mon, how much time is left?)
Timer: -doesn't look at me-
Me: (Seriously. I'm sure if you just made eye contact, I would somehow know how much time is left and my soul would be thus appeased and I could survive the rest of this speech.)
Timer: -doesn't look at me-
Me: (This is not working.)

Is my jealousy of the timer rational? No, of course not. But rationality is not a concern when you're hopelessly bored. Have you ever noticed how people glance at the timer from time to time during a long speech, but never during a really good one? This is why.

You're homeschooled. I hope this post wasn't too long for you.