Debaters and Their Rolly Luggage- Katherine Kwong

(Katherine is super and awesome, and she wrote the latest super awesome Guest Post! Yay!)

When I first joined speech and debate, which was in 2009, our first impression upon arriving at a tournament was, “WOW, look at all the blacks suits!” our second impression was, “What is all this rolly luggage for?” “Oh, those people are debaters,” my dad answered (he is quick to notice those things). 

Technically, I know, “rolly” is not a word. However it adequately describes the black luggage a debater rolls around. Here are several things I have noted about debaters and their rolly luggage. If you are a debater, then take pride that your rolly luggage accomplishes at least one of the following things.

1. It makes a queer noise. 

You know that sound of wheels in hall or on a sidewalk, kinda roll, roll roll shooooooogghghghghghghghghhgghhshooooghghgoo, *click  *clack…..stomp, stomp stomp stomp stomp, *shick  *click , roll, roll roll, roll. That was a debater with rolly luggage walking down a sidewalk, hitting bumpy cobblestone, going down stairs and then walking on another sidewalk (it helps to say the sounds out loud.) If you’re a speaker you know the sound of rolly debater luggage going by your speaking room when you are trying to say your fantastic speech. Not only do the wheels make funny noises but the handle does too. I was in a hallway that was absolutely quiet, when I heard this ominous *schick *click *clack. I was ready to throw my hands in the air and say, “no officer it was not me!” When I looked behind and thought, “Ohhh….it’s just a debater collapsing the handle of her rolly luggage." Rolly luggage makes a queer noise, 'nuff said.

2. It makes you get out of the way.

When you hear the queer noise of the luggage behind you, you are best advised to step aside lest you be crushed under the superior ball bearing wheels and reinforced bottom of some debater’s rolly luggage. Debaters take up the majority of any sidewalk with their luggage, so stay at least a block a head of them. Seriously, debaters should have their own crosswalks. 

3. Rolly luggage gets in the way. 

If you have tripped over a debater’s rolly luggage, they merely pull them close and say, “sawy.” The other much more annoying thing is when postings are up. In the ubiquitous posting mush-pot, you notice a space in one of the best vantage points to see the precious postings. Upon inquiry (and a shove) as to why no one is standing in that prime spot, you realize that, “Oh, a debater’s rolly luggage is in it.” The debater with his luggage is so busy looking for his friend’s posting that apparently he has no idea he is an inconvenience. Simply put, his luggage is in the way (also he does not even have a speech, he looking for his friend’s speech). 

4. Debater’s are protective of their rolly luggage. 

A debater’s rolly luggage is much like his second arm, or leg, or maybe brain (on account of the 15lbs of TP evidence and briefs in it). Debaters are CONSTANTLY seen with their rolly luggage. At postings, at rounds, at coming back from rounds, at lunch! They lean their arms causally on the top handle as if it were a portable armchair. They almost never leave their luggage alone; for fear it will be lost in the 10 dozen other luggage bags that resemble it. When a debater loses (God forbid) his rolly luggage, immediately, 3 club moms will branch out in search parties to reunite their tearful debater with his rolly luggage and precious evidence. Simply put, place a nametag on your luggage.

4. Debater’s rolly luggage is like Mary Poppin’s carpetbag. 

One upside to debater’s rolly luggage is the fact that they can carry SO much. Not only can they fit files packed with evidence and briefs in them, but also they manage to fit, water, post its, pens, lunch, (and for girls) hair care products, another jacket, or whatever it is, you name it!

You’re homeschooled, you own rolly luggage, *click!